Why Retirement Is About More Than Money

Episode 1 Transcripts [Music] You're listening to the Retirement Life Podcast, a place where we help you cast a vision for your retirement and take the next steps to live it. I'm Tony Hall here with my co-host Rc Arseneau. And each episode, we'll bring you real stories, honest conversations, and practical ideas to help you build a retirement that's meaningful and life-giving. Let's jump in. Well, welcome to the very first episode of the Retirement Life Podcast. I'm your host, Tony Hall, with my good friend and co-host, RC. Uh we're here to talk honestly and sometimes humorously and hopefully about what retirement really looks like. Uh whether you're counting down the days um already retired, just kind of wondering what comes next, this is a place to imagine the life that you've dreamed of and to take steps toward living that. Uh RC, it's fun to say the very first episode. I feel like we have um dreamed about this, talked about this for a long long time and so it feels really good to be sitting here and doing this. How how are you feeling for for sure? I'm feeling great. I'm excited. Yeah. W I feel like I need to welcome you. Well, thank you. Yeah, we're here episode one. Yeah, this is fun. This is really fun. Uh it's exciting and and so I thought um with this being our very first episode, it' probably be good to let uh our listeners know who we are and really what we're doing and and how we got to here, why we do the retirement life. And so if you want to just take a few minutes and and introduce yourself and tell your story and and how you got here. Yeah, I'm super excited because this podcast is really just an extension like a continuation of conversations that we've been having and that really started um really a few years ago now. As some background, I'm a financial adviser. I've been working with retirees for 30 years. And so I've had the pleasure of hearing conversations of people going through retirement, entering into retirement, learning things at work, things that are creating struggles. And um and then in that process um my wife and I of 30 years, more than 30 years um we have entered our early 50s and we've got three children and just had our third grandbaby. That's so awesome. Yeah. And so we we started getting into kind of this, you know, mid midlife kind of area and and having the grandbabies I think too really created this kind of new phase and we started having new discussions and they were coinciding with what was going on in in my financial planning practice and that was that I was having clients that had finally reached retirement and we had spent most of our time talking about the money, worrying about the money, and and then when people get there, we're getting mixed results on their happiness, right? And it turns out that just having enough money, just doing the planning with the dollars wasn't always cutting it and there was more. And I was feeling like we needed to open up that conversation to other things that were being missed. And so that's Dena and I started having those discussions of what would this look like to have these conversations with people as they were going into retirement. Uh and so we we began work on really kind of a course of uh that people could go through and um and and had kind of a group that we were testing that out on which you were a part of. Right. And so, um, as we developed this course and and and this came together, it just became clear that we were just beginning the conversations. These were important things that we talk about, but we needed to continue uh having this conversation. That's where this podcast really, you know, we're excited to get this going because this is that continuation of those conversations. It's awesome. Yeah. And and grandbaby number three is like a week old now. A week old. Is that right? Yeah. I'm so impressed that you're here. It's amazing. It's awesome. Yeah, it's I mean that on a I dream of it. I cannot wait for grandkids and then holding them as much as my kids will let me hold them. I just cannot wait. I It's a joy to think about. I'm happy for you and Dena in that. Thank you. Um well, just a little bit about me. Um and kind of how we got here and and and why I'm here also. Um I'm Tony. I've been a pastor for 30 years. Um, I'm a single dad of five boys from ages 23 down to 16 next week. And um, as a person, I love what I do and I love my boys. And so um, spending time with them, doing things with them, just we have a blast. life is really good. I'm really thankful and um and I love pastoring. I have loved pastoring. Um and in the midst of that, I care about people and and so yeah, I mean, you guys invited me into this discussion, this focus group. Um told me some about kind of your dreams and and things that you have for this and um some about me um personally. So in 2020 which was pretty easy year I think for everybody totally um in 2020 uh between the beginning of co and also kind of a another major thing that was happening in my life um it felt like there was just a collision that happened inside of me and um my body just said all done like and and so as I look back on it now I I know that I've had anxiety my whole life, but I didn't know that in 2020 until my body told me, "Yeah, you've got anxiety." Um, and and what I found is um that anxiety has really been tied to um aging and and and specifically to health issues, um anything related to my heart, anything like that. And so, um, I just, man, for a season was spiraling and and felt like I couldn't get out of it. Knew that I was healthy, knew that I there was nothing wrong, but my brain just couldn't accept that. And so, I was spiraling in that. Um, and over the course of, you know, these last years, learning about myself, learning about those anxieties, learning about my my past, the history that that has has kind of gotten me there. Um and and so I was sitting in the focus group with you guys and I remember um you guys talking about the perceptions of getting older and of course our generation you highlighted in it um is when we were growing up like you go to the store whether it's Hallmark or the grocery store and you go to the card section Yeah. and any birthday cards that related to 40 years old or up is like devastating, right? I mean They're black or they're like, you know, it's over the hill. It's, you know, it's the it's end of days type, right? And so, you know, by the black balloons for Absolutely. Yes. Which be kind of funny, which is fun. It's totally fun, but we can buy into that as well. We can we can get to a place where we are um believing that those years are the worst years. Those years are the ones to be avoided. those years are the ones to be feared and and I think I bought into that. And so in that focus group, I mean, when you guys talked about that, it was it was sincerely life-changing for me. I mean, it was a turning point for me about um being able to look ahead with hope. Yeah. and and realizing, you know, I remember you and I just talking one day and and um I'm 52 years old now and and you just highlighting like, you know, we still have our entire adult life ahead of us. So all of the years that we've been an adult, we still have that ahead of us. That's a long time. And so for me personally, I've really desired to be a part of this with you guys just to bring other people along on this joyful journey. Because I think a lot of people can be afraid. They can be uncertain. They don't know what is next. They don't know what's coming after work. So many people find their identity in what they do. And when that page turns and I'm not doing that anymore, really, who am I? And what hope is there moving forward? Yeah. Yeah. I know some of the big takeaways from that initial pilot group that you were a key part of was um a lot of those people that came, they were people that I already knew. They were they were friends, they were family, they were clients, you know, people that I knew some of their stories already. Um, and it had some of these conversations, but even still, when you know, Dean and I kind of unpacked some of this information, we were trying to get a feel like, does this matter? Is this something that you would be interested in leaning into? And overwhelmingly, the feedback was, yes, these are these are things we want to like talk more about. And and the reason I think is because when it comes to retirement, we just think of it as you're picking a date and you know, make sure you've got enough money or hope you have enough money and then you just cross over that line and then you just submit to whatever life happens to you beyond that, right? and and it really is a transition and we we'll unpack this, right? You know, through through the different episodes here, but um and and what's happening is there are so many conversations that no one is having. Absolutely. We're just not talking about these things because who do you talk to? There's not like a a person you go to talk to about these things and and sometimes we're just not comfortable talking about them even with our friends because retirement is supposed to be awesome. Absolutely. And so when people say, "Hey, is our how's retirement going?" Ah, it's great. I just I wake up whenever I want to. I I can do whatever I want to whenever I want to. You know, the problem is Yeah. they're waking up at noon, starting happy hour at 1:30 and watching, you know, old '8s reruns for the rest of the day. And so, you know, um it just takes people by surprise and they and a lot of it comes down to planning and being intentional and but we need to do that together. And that's really what I'm excited about for this because it's about us walking alongside you and doing this together. And that's we've been doing it absolutely together. And it's been one of the joys I've had with Dena having these conversations. We've had amazing conversations together just trying to unpack these ideas and and we're in the early stages really just thinking about, you know, h being on the runway to retirement. But I think the the the other thing that I hope we cover a lot of here and that we kind of expose is that this idea this old re this idea of what retirement is. We need to retire, if I can be that cheesy, we need to retire this traditional stale idea of retirement because it just isn't working anymore. Yeah. Right. I think it's great. Yeah. You know, if you retire at 65, you don't just have eight years to live anymore. Now, we have 20, 30 years of some of the potential best years of our lives. You know, we've never been more equipped. We've never been re more ready to do great things than we are now. Yeah. And that's what I hope we we dive into. Yeah. I that is so good and so important. One of the things you said to me at one point and and um in that is like we're stepping into retirement what you just said knowing more than I I mean I I just told my church weeks ago I was 22 years old when I started pastoring. Yeah. That I was an idiot. Like that's that I mean I what in the like caring for people Yeah. and like just the immaturity in in in that age and and all of the things that come with it. And when we're stepping into retirement, I mean, we've we have this entire life where we've gained wisdom. We and and we don't want to step into retirement and do nothing with that. And I know what you just mentioned, one of the great desires for me is community. And yeah, when you're saying that we're doing this together, you're not doing this alone. and we're doing this together and I know our aim is is very much connecting people with people. We want to help in that but being able to connect people with other people, encouraging people, man, don't retire and stay in your house. Don't retire and just be alone. There are people who are walking the same path that you are. And and we're made for community. We're made to be with other people. And so if we can help assist in that as well, um we want to do that. I'm so excited. Absolutely. So excited to see where this goes. So excited to hear from others in this process as we're going through this. Um just so you know as a listener, we're going to be um doing this every two weeks. So we'll have an episode uh every two weeks. Um most of the time it's probably just going to be me and RC. Occasionally we're going to have some guests that we bring in. We're excited about that. We'll have different topics uh throughout. Um one of the things that that RC mentioned already is um retirement is not just about finances and I think that is we get stuck in that. There's a there's a line or a number that I'm looking towards and once I hit that number then I've made it. I'm ready to retire. But there is so much more to consider purpose in retirement. What am I going to do with my time? um what am I going to do with the the the lack of people that I have been around for 40 hours a week for 40 years or whatever it is. Um how am I going to manage my health? Uh what about my relationships? Um definitely what am I going to do as it relates to money? Um there are there there are things that we step into in the retirement years like experiencing more loss than in the past, but also more joy and do I want to travel and what does that look like and um and and so we're going to work through and talk through a lot of that as we go forward in the podcast. Um but we want to we want to encourage you in that. If you have questions, uh if you have a story to share, we would love to hear um from you. We'd love to hear your story. Uh you can find us on Facebook by searching the retirement life. Uh you can visit our website uh to connect. Uh but before we wrap up, I do want to say um this is exciting. Uh RC, I'm so excited to do this with you as my friend. Uh I'm excited for the conversations. Um, for those that are listening, I mean, you're really getting to step into um, what we do very often. I mean, and uh, I apologize um, for that ahead of time. Um, I'm just really looking forward to spending this time. I'm really looking forward to engaging in these topics. I have friends who have just stepped into retirement. I have friends who are uh, about to step into retirement. I have friends who've stepped into retirement and then stepped back into working because it is confusing. Yeah. It's chaotic. It's hard. Yeah. Um and yet with the right amount of planning and the right focus in approaching it, I know you agree with this. Um it could it could be the most joyful season of life. Uh when people ask me, "What are you looking forward to most?" Without questions, grandkids. I mean to have freed up time to have grandkids to spend time with them. Oh man, I am I'm so looking forward to it. But yeah. Yeah. You know, and I want to say when you use the word planning, sometimes people think of that as like it's a job. It's almost like, well, I don't I'm not really looking forward to doing that. That sounds like work. But what I what I hope that we engage in and and help people realize is that sometimes planning is just having conversations. just just being connected with other people and sometimes it's friendships and sometimes it's professionals that can help you in a certain part of your walk and and that's what we want to be are connectors for you. We want to be here to help walk alongside you through this process just as we're we're doing this together. So part of it is is you're watching us walk through this together. Absolutely. Um, but with the benefit of a lot of a lot of experienced people that we know through our careers that we've been able to learn from and we want to pass all of that on as well. Yeah. Yeah. That's so great. Well, wherever you are in this journey, uh, whether retirement feels exciting, uh, terrifying, or kind of somewhere in between, again, you're not alone. We're walking it, too. We want to walk it with you. Our hope is that this podcast becomes a place where you feel seen, uh, encouraged, and maybe even inspired. Um, you don't have to have it all figured out. And, and so, um, come along on this journey with us. Thank you for joining us for episode one of the retirement life. Uh, be sure to subscribe, follow us on Facebook, and come back for episode two. We're going to talk about something uh, we hear a lot. What if I'm not looking forward to retirement? That's a real feeling. and and we're going to talk honestly about it. But thanks so much. This podcast is intended for general information, educational, entertainment purposes, and is not intended to provide financial, legal, medical, health, or lifestyle advice. Individuals should seek your own advice from a qualified professional. It is not an endorsement of any particular product, service, or organization. The opinions and views expressed on this podcast are those of the participants and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the Retirement Life. The Retirement Life and Arseneau Financial are separate entities. This podcast is not to be considered a solicitation for investment or financial planning services through Arseneau Financial LLC. [Music]